I’ve had time to reflect lately, something I need to do to assess where I am going, what I am doing and I have to laugh at the old adage that a person can’t change. Well, I’m living proof that a person can and let me tell you, I am SO glad I did! I reflect on my teens, my twenties and my thirties and I will be the first to admit that my guardian angels were working overtime to keep me safe and continue on in this life. The lessons are priceless and I will not take them for granted!
All people are different, including those with ADHD so my experiences and my actions are those specifically “RaeAnne” based, I am not speaking for anyone else. Growing up I knew I could do anything in the world that I wanted to, no one could tell me anything different and I was blessed with parents who didn’t tell me otherwise though I sure did put them through the wringer with my shenanigans. By the time I was 12, I had changed out my first engine in our 1962 Chevy truck having decided (with my father) that it was going to be my first vehicle. I wanted to be a world-sought horse trainer and my mother told me that I had to go for riding lessons, when the trainer told my mother that I was competent enough to train a yearling she would let me start training. She thought it would be years, I believe it was 6 weeks before the trainer pulled my mom aside and told her that I had a gift with horses. I trained my first horse before turning 14. I could go on and on, having 30+ years of spur of the moment, fly by the seat of my pants, Mach 10 with-my-hair-on-fire experiences but you get the point, I was open and willing to do anything, try anything, live day by day, minute by minute. I laughed at those who had day timers and pitied the fact that they had a schedule that tied them down.
My current life is SO much different and I honestly can say that I’m happy with the change. When I hit my 30’s, having been divorced and homeless, I decided no one was going to hand me my new life. I worked hard, bought my own mini-ranch and started raising Tennessee Walking Horses. I started keeping a schedule so that I could keep track of heat cycles, horse shows and work meetings. I started looking forward to things I had planned and enjoyed the last-minute trips less and less. Now, married again with two daughters, an eclectic mixture of horses, chickens and dogs, 2 college degrees and on my 4th career, I am the proud owner of not only one day timer, but two. I wish I could say that with my day timers I don’t have the chaos anymore but that would be a lie. I’m juggling a schedule filled with dance recitals, 4H, ranch repairs, car repairs, meetings, marketing, blogs and even the mundane things like laundry and supper that HAS to be done, my life is as busy if not busier. I think that if I didn’t have my beloved day timers that I would be lost, wandering around like a zombie, unsure of what to do, where to go, where I need to be. I enjoyed the freedom my teens and twenties offered but I will admit, I’m enjoying my forties just as much. It’s a different kind of chaos but I changed, I grew, I adapted. I am sure that when I hit my 50’s, I will have to change and grow and adapt as my girls graduate and start their own lives without Steve and I. I’m SO glad I’m not a jaguar! Life is meant to be fun, enjoy the journey!