I have to admit that at the beginning of the summer, I fell into the summer blues. Sadness is not a normal emotion for me, being nicknamed Miss Suzie Sunshine, and I struggled with this unfamiliar emotion more than a few times within a couple of months. Because of this sadness, I began to doubt all of my decisions, my actions, and my life’s purpose. I wondered who I was because the things I had desired ten years ago were no longer important. Because of having to deal with satellite internet with our move, I was forced to spend less time on the internet and more time with myself and my thoughts. I know, a dangerous combination!
For the first couple of months I bombarded my friends with my tearful declarations of wanting to move back into town, that I was no longer a country girl, that I missed the conveniences of town. Then I fell into seclusion due to the fact that the house we are buying has SO much trash everywhere and my beloved Quarter horse gelding, Diego, was seriously injured. I had to start cleaning up the property to keep my animals safe. While dealing with the property, we’ve also dealt with severe draught and fire conditions, the worst our town has seen since 1978, so I’m told by the locals, and having to downsize our horses to two because of the hay shortage. I also decided to have this huge garden, help my husband build a new chicken coop and clean up the one building I love the most, the garage.
It’s during this time that I’ve watched my daughters play in the lower horse pasture, acres and acres of freedom, laughing and running and having a blast. I have no worries about someone driving by and snatching them, we live on a dead-end country road. I started to notice that my husband and I talked more about little things, dreams, the future and we enjoyed just sitting outside listening to nature, not cars and sirens. We watched does and their babies feed along side of our horses and a bachelor of bucks wander down and try and nibble at our trees. I’m picking out areas for my patio area where we are going to build a fire pit with horseshoe pits, volleyball and other entertainment so that our friends will feel welcome and have fun when they come over.
I will admit I haven’t written as much as I had intended to but I honestly believe I’ve gone through another growth in my life. We are always learning and this was a doosey for me. I am still a country girl, I appreciate the conveniences of the city but I can adapt without them just fine. I thought that I had learned my large life lessons but I now know I was wrong. You’re never too old to have your life turned upside down and have to re-evaluate where you are. Remember, life is meant to be fun, enjoy the journey!